what on earth is going on in my heart?

uh oh. i put some david gray on. what is it about "white ladder" that makes me feel sentimental? god knows i wouldn't consider myself a DG fan - i have this one cd. i really really like it. but i don'tknow shit about any of his other music...i don't think i've ever even heard any of his live stuff.

anyway.
that's besides the point.

the point is that my blog has truly lost something! and i know exactly why - i've picked up the paper journal again in the past month or so. damn, it's gotten good, too. ;)

let the busy season begin!

today should be pretty tame...i have some plans for laundry and the mall.
gotta be up early tomorrow for a doctor's appointment, then i'm supposed to do something with colin. tomorrow night is a party at bob and jeremy's. saturday jane is coming over to help me with some packing. i think we'll bake cookies while packing. because my mom bought a whole bunch of cookie-making-stuff that we were gonna use on christmas eve...it just never happened. then saturday night a bunch of us are going out for a nice dinner, who knows what'll happen after that. then sunday i'm going to a brunch with my mom...

new years looks like it could pan out 4 ways. i was thinking jim's house. but now it looks like paul's house, the bars, or phoenix are also options. weeeee shall see!

you wanna hear something ghetto?

i'm all out of light bulbs. so when i want light in the living room, i put my one remaining one in there. if i want it in the bedroom, i gotta think about it like 20 minutes in advancece so i can turn the livingroom lamp off and give it a chance to cool off before i make the switch.

i'm cat-sitting for these clients of my mom until the 1st. really sweet cats...

i have to go over there every other day and take care of the litter box and food and water and mail and that stuff. nothing challenging in the slightest. and they gave me $50. which i KNOW is too much.

but i just can't decide whether to give it back or not.

brat brat brat.

what a good christmas.

i mean, i was pretty stressed about it. i always am. something about "old habbits die hard..."

but it ended up being full of pleasant surprises and some pretty heavy duty realizations on my part...and now i find myself pretty overwhemled. and i find myself overwhelmed by the fact that there's so many people i want to call right now just to tell them what they mean to me...from family members(shocker) to friends here and friends there... there's so many people in my life who i love so much. and i don't think many of them realize it.

so rather than go on and on about it, i'll just say once again that it was a really good two days. i'm lucky as hell to live the life i do. and i'll say to all of those of you out there reading who probably know you fall into that category of people who i love with all my heart - thank you. ya'll mean the world to me.

merry christmas, everyone :)

third night in a row of really vivid dreams with dmb people in them.

i need a fix.

that sucks.

i'm really glad that windows media player is reading my 8/23/00 mayer show as soundgarden's down on the upside. weird.

huston, we MAY just have a problem.

i just made cover art for the U2 show i'm giving colin and jane, and for one of the dmb shows i'm giving my mom...and i really truly enjoyed it.

ok. i'm going through my old website once again. i came upon two emails i'd written to friends about the john story and the nick story. keep in mind that these were both written in late '97/early '98, so they're waaaaaaaaaay outdated. but they give the foundations quite nicely if you can stand to wade through them.

nick.

john.

(the following happened after a bunch of other dreaming. i was in seattle visiting. but that's a whole nother dream involving soap opera stars and switching bodies with them and a whole bunch of hilarious stuff i can't put in any sequence. anyway. dream switches to "reality", and we decided to take nate and jenna to the airport or something...can't remember.)

sitting on a plane with mike. nate and jenna are in the row in front of us. mike and i are goofing around, and the stewardess comes by. she's an asian woman who doesn't speek english very well. she asks me what color i want? i'm confused, because i think she's supposed to be asking me which meal i want. so i ask "what?" and she asks what color crayon i like best. i ask "what?" again and she gives a frustrated sign and goes away for a little bit.

so i turn my attention to back to mike. suddenly it hits me that jenna's probably joining them for christmas, so i ask if that's the case, and he says yes, and i start laughing because it's clear she's not having a very good time.

it is is then made clear in the dream that we're on a plane to wenatchee(that's probably not how you spell it. i don't care though. it's a real place, i just don't know how to spell it). i then start questioning how in the hell mike and and i even got on the plane in the first place, because i know we didn't buy tickets. wenatchee is a stop over for the other two on their way to somewhere in idaho.

so anyway, i look to mike for explanation. he reminds me how we were just handed the boarding cards with seat numbers(like on southwest airlines), so he decided we should take advantage of their idiocy and board. might be fun.

so then the asian woman comes back with paper menus, where we're supposed to write down what we want. (this was taken directly out of my experience on friday where they ordered lunch for the jurors because we were being sequestered.) i remember marking the box for a particular sandwich, and a particular salad with red wine vinaigrette(this was clearly not one of today's flights. there was good food!). the red wine vinaigrette was taken straight out of my first viewing of "emeril live!" last night.

anyway. so i'm picking at my salad. just messing the lettuce around. we're engaged in some kind of entertaining babble. and at this point, we're on the ground in wenatchee. i look outside and realize there's snow on the ground. apparently that big blizzard that hit california has moved it's way up the coast.

so i start thinking.

and wondering what mike's plan for getting us back to seattle is - are we gonna rely on the same fluke of them accidentally handing us boarding passes? and i realize the airport will probably shut down soon because of the snow. are we gonna rent a car and drive back or something?

so we're walking out of the plane, into the terminal, and there's all these rope things set up...as if they were waiting for a line. and rather than going through the maze, the rest of my party(there's a 5th person there now, i just don't know who) just starts going under them. so i decide to just unlatch one of the rope things. and it catches jenna in the neck. and i start to giggle.

then i woke up.

i got to hang out with colin's little sister tonight. the girl who i've watched grow up, and who is now attending UofO at eugene and was drinking in my presence. it was great. and of course, she told me that her and her friends discovered the mayer boy back in september, so i had some story-telling time. i'm pretty sure she'll be visiting me in seattle. :)

ummm...what else?

the past 24 hours have been graced by phone calls from ice, rach, jen, bobbo and nate. that's a lot of freaks in a short period of time! i've absolutley loved it. damn, i miss those guys...

ok. i'm gonna go write and then try and finish my book.

this cracked me up. the little description below the link to my page is classic.

you should go listen to raven. :)

a year ago today...i joined the freak list!

it's over!

that was one hung jury, though. let me tell you.

the only thing we could agree on was the fact that it was a shit case, and that the lawyers did not do their jobs at all. that in itself suggests a verdict of not guilty to me, but whatever. old people are really stuck in their ways and have a hard time understanding that we're supposed to use the rules the judge gives us and facts from the case ONLY, rather than speculation and opinions.

i'll blog more about it later - it really was an interesting experience.

just went and broke my lease.
and called my insurance agent and found out that despite the fact that my speeding ticket was a class 3 misdemenor, it won't effect my insurance rate. so i went and got a money order to send in the whole fucking $277. because my court date wouldn't be until mid march to mid april...and you figure in the fact that it'll cost me at least $150 to fly back here, plus the fact that my ticket would most likely just be dropped to $190...i'm gonna be paying out the ass no matter what. so...yeah. i'm just pleading guilty.

shock me shock me shock me with that deviant behavior.

damn. now i really wanna watch empire records.

anyway.

now i'm gonna start cleaning and burning cd's.

your honor. for the record, i would like to submit to evidence the fact that amanda moreno is going to bed at 10:15pm this 20th day of december, 2001. this is a feat she has not accomplished for possibly five years or more.

ok. thursday night television rocks.

i'm watching survivor right now. which i really shouldn't be doing because i've been able to avoid it basically all season, and i don't wanna get hooked on it...

but that's besides the point.

the point is that "a beautiful mind" intrigues the hell out of me. i can't wait to see it.

sigh.

gotta go back for more deliberating tomorrow. i can't believe this week is gone...and that i haven't gotten anything done that i needed to(besides mailing out christmas cards). my life is such a mess right now. and i don't mean mentally - i mean my physical living spaces are just TRASHED.

lol

my appartment is so messy i really can't even stand to be here. but the last thing i feel like doing after sitting in a court room and a jury room all day is cleaning. plus - this clean needs to be a good one. i move in less than a month. do you hear me? LESS THAN A MONTH!!!

my car...good god. so much shit in there.

i need to do laundry like none other. i need to organize, and throw things out, and pack things up. and go buy plastic drawers and other things nikki suggested to make my life easier. god bless her.

oh, GOD, i need to start my christmas stuff. luckily, i don't have to do any shopping. but i have to make somewhere around 30 cd's. and i wanted to make cover art and be all creative...we'll see how that goes.

i need to go talk to the office and break my lease and talk them out of making me pay through the asshole.

keep having to reschedule my check-up for my wisdom teeth.

need a doctor's appointment, but i can already tell you that just isnt' gonna happen.

gotta get colin and matt to help me move some massive pieces of furniture this weekend at the latest. haven't even asked them about it, or rounded up a truck to use...or cleared out those pieces of furniture for that matter.

i need to call the casa grande court, which is something that should have been done a while ago. i gotta figure out if i can file for continuance for my court date thingie. gotta go get a money order to send in to them.

so many bills to be paid.

(good GOD, i'm making MONEY this week!! yay! $160 at the minimum! that's great in my jobless state!)

ah, shit. i need to book mel's flight out here too.

i don't think this all would stress me out *quite* as much if i wasnt sick and if i wasn't just wanting to crawl into bed and sleep for a while.

eh, anyway.

pizza's here. and pizza sounds much better than computer time or cleaning time or organizing time or anything else for that matter.

oh, and before i forget... this was the toast i initiated after the gift exchange(all the boys chose each other in a drawing)

i've known most of you for about 6 years...some more, some less...but it's displays like this that make my love for each of you grow even more...thank you for that....

oh my god, i have so much to say about tonight. but alas, i'm too drunk and tired to fufill this requirement.

so i will. sooon.

but i love my highschool boys. and i can't wait to see the roll of film i tool tonight.

took, even.

i am so fucking lucky to have so many fucking cool people in my life....

ihaven't been this stressed out in a good year or so.

so much to do...and jury duty JUST WON'T END!!!!!

i'm emotional. can you tell?
and it's not PMS. god help us all.

oh, and i'm still not done. i lied.

tomorrow night is the "company christmas party." i won't go into the origins of the name. it's just all of my highschool boys gathered for a gift exchange.

anyway. this is the only time of year i get really extremley insecure. old habbits die hard. it's just because i have to see the two girls who were my best friends through highschool who have been two of the main reasons behind my extreme issues with trust. i'm over it, and i've learned and i'm comfortable with myself and all that shit, but still...i can't help but lapse into that old frame of mind every once in a while. you know?

no, you probably don't.

because once again, i'm being vague.

PAPER JOURNAL, here i come!

oh, yeah, i forgot one more thing.

i had a coughing attack during the trial today. yeah, it was great fun. i loved it. one of those attacks where you cannot stop coughing. and if you try, your chest involuntarily spasms and your eyes water and....yeah. ugly stuff.

so i went straight to walgreens on my lunch break to buy cough drops.

oh, god. andhearing this crowd during "all i want is you."

mmmmm mmmmm MMMMM!

have i mentioned i was selected for jury duty?

well, i was. my second and hopefully last day is tomorrow. though i have to admit, it is rather interesting. i think i missed my calling as a lawyer. plus - i'm getting paid for it. which is more than i can say for any other typical unemployed day in the life of amanda.

and in addition to some other things, i got the U2 show i was at as a surprise in the mail today. nevermind the fact that i've sent out blanks for it already - it's the thought that counts.

anyway.

went out with a bunch of friends tonight. stayed sober cuz i have to sit in the courtroom all day tomorrow(something which actually requires me to be alert). bob and i talked about a bunch of shit, including whatever it was that happened between jeremy and i a few months back. i hadn't really thought about it until bob and i started talking about it.

but...it was...definitely one of the more memorable experiences of my life. just because him and i click in that really rare way. (he's a hardcore phish phan. come on, now.)

but..yeah. there was no sex. just...

i'm so not getting into this. i'm just thinking about it quite a bit, because i haven't until this point. i'm glad he persued what had been building that one night, and i'm glad i went with it. and i'm glad we listened to a bunch of dave shows in the process. heh.

i want to run
i want to hide
i want to tear down the walls
that hold me inside

anyway. we had our night, and now we're back to just adoring eachother. and i love it when things end that way.

i'm making no sense, i know.

vagueness rules.

damn, i'm so fucking thoughtful right now.

probably stemming from the fact that the move is SO close, and i'm having SO many thoughts about it that i'm not expressing to anyone...

i'm stopping now. :)

um.

i NEED the next tour to start. NOW.

oh, man.

i'm so happy right now.

oh my GOD this bowl tastes like ass.

*dreaming of seattle kind*

i get home from my second day at jury duty, delerious out of my gord, and find a very highly anticipated video in my mailbox. ALL i want in the world is to smoke a bowl and watch. but do i have weed? oh no! not i! because i haven't bought weed since i got back from the gorge!

so i'm compiling ashes from the various half smoked bowls in my pieces.

path.et.ic.

(but necessary :) )

i wanted to blog today about how a year ago on this date i made the trip that changed my life forever. i decided to fly across the country and put my trust in people i didn't know at all. without that trip, i don't even wanna know where i'd be. and i met matias, and joyce and lenelle, and was introduced to a thing called "the freak list."

but, alas, i'm tired as all fucking hell and just don't feel like it. :)

here's to moments of insanity and spontaneous decisions.

i just blogged about how much i don't remember from last night. but it was lost.

i don't remember anything from last night. and it's annoying me. especially looking at my cellphone and realizing i did a nice round of calling everyone i know.

good job, amanda.

now it's time to go face the friends and learn about what kinds of escapades occured.

i've gotten out of jury duty so far every week this month, but i was fully aware that i was going to have to go sometime next week. no biggie, really, i just don't like getting up early because i'm a whiny bitch.

but i just called to check what my scheduled time is: 12:30 monday.

word UP.

i really need to send in my ticket from that little episode on U2 day. i've pretty much decided i want to go to court for it, because A.) $277 is a lot of fucking money and B.) i don't want to deal with insurance rates going up. but there are two things that suck about this. the first being that my court date will undoubtedly be sometime in the 6 months that i'm not living here. so i'll either have to spend money to fly out here, which blows, or i might be able to file for continuance or something like that. the second thing that sucks about it is that i've got to send that $277 in until the trial. and i really just don't have that money right now. whereas if i just pleaded guilty, i could send it in in 10 payments. but that blows the whole insurance thing...oooooooooh, the trials and tribulations of life. ;)

good LAWD my downstairs neighbors are having some fun right now. there must be 20 of them down there, singing songs in spanish at the top of their lungs and just generally screaming and yelling and carrying on. doesn't really bother me any, but i'm sure their next door neighbors(the ones underneath me who tend to be super cracked out or something - but that's a story for another time) are flipping their shit. when i got home a little bit ago, the security guard was standing in front just listening or something, and tried to tell me that i couldn't go in there, thinking that's where i was headed.

silly security guard.

have i told you how much i hate rent-a-cops?

well, i guess i like security people here because they give me some false sense of security. but the rent-a-cops that hang out at like...ampm or circle k or whatnot...those guys take themselves WAY too fucking seriously. i can't help but laugh at them.

i'm stopping now.

ok FUCK percoset.

first pill - made me feel like a crackhead.
second pill - made me feel like i was gonna puke, so i fell asleep for about half an hour and when i woke up i was ok.
third pill - made me puke.

so fuck 'em. my mom gave me some vicodin, but i really don't think i need them. maybe tomorrow my mouth will hurt more than it does, but i'm doubting it right now. i wasn't expecting much pain - i had two little tiny dinky wisdom teeth on top that were already all the way in, so it's not like it was major surgery, they just had to pop the bastards out. but still, it was ridiculously easy.

fucking percosets.

and i was looking forward to the leftovers, too! but i'm not fucking taking these things. i want my money back!

(this was written earlier this afternoon, but my mom's dsl has major issues so i couldn't publish from over there.)


*giggle*

guess what?

i get to see howie! i finally get to see howie! opening for OAR in portland and seattle. it's about fucking time!!! and what an excellent "welcome to the northwest" present it will be! and to think, just a week or so later, when OAR hits phoenix and tucson, howie will no longer be with them.

i'm so damned excited about this.

oh, yeah. and i had my wisdom teeth taken out. it was amusing more than anything else. took my valium, and then had to wait, just lying in the chair for a good 20 mins to half an hour. then the doc came in and put that lovely nitrous-feeder-thingie around my nose.

i love nitrous. yes, i have done whippits and the like before. it's one of my favorite highs, but it just isn't all that great for ya, and doesn't last more than about a minute when you're huffing it out of a balloon.

so anyway. they come in and tell me to start taking deep breaths. and i start to remember the joys of a nitrous high. and then he tells me to open wide. so i felt a few pokes, heard him say "turn your head towards me" a few times, and then they stuck some gauze in my mouth.

at this point i figured they had the prep work done or something.

oh, no. they sat me up and let me go.

i walked into the waiting room laughing my ass off, and wondering if it was some kind of joke. could getting my wisdom teeth out really have been FUN? i guess it took half an hour, which is much longer than the two minutes i could have sworn it took...but still. i don't remember much, and here i am, 8 hours later, and i really don't feel a thing.

and yeah, these percosets are making me feel rather cracked out instead of drowsy.

and i'm in SUCH a good mood!

so i'm gonna go watch john black cut the chip out of hope's head so that the evil people can't turn her back into princess gena.

i get my wisdom teeth out in t minus 6 hours and 40 minutes. bummer, dude.

colin has promised to bring me jackie chan movies to watch. what an angel.

yes, that was sarcasm.

but loving sarcasm.

in other news: i'm not supposed to eat or drink anything but i'm really fucking thirsty. so i'm saying screw it. oooooooooooooooooh, such a rebel.

went to try my hand at selling back my 3 remaining books.

$56.50!!!!!

that's so much better than 3!!!!!

fuckity fuck i'm tired. that's what i get for doing drugs while sick. time to go take a nap.

there is nothing quite like the feeling of beind DONE with a semester.

especially a particularly difficult semester. not that i'm saying it was an academically difficult semester, ,just....

jeeze. must i ALWAYS explain myself?! i think not!

you say you want
your love to work out right
to last with me through the night
you say you want
your diamonds and a ring of gold
your story to remain untold
your love not to grow cold...

3 things:

first: they're playing in vancouver. lalalalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

second: i love watching rosie when tom is on. it makes me giggle.

third: there was also a very talented 11 year old country singer on rosie today. and to think - that girl's voice has yet to blossom.

ok. my two hours of pretending-to-do-work are over now.

ok. you know what PISSES ME OFF????!??!?!?!?!?!

when i spend over $350 on books for school, and go to sell most of them back and get THREE DOLLARS!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!! for the love of all that is holy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE DOLLARS doesn't buy me shit! THREE DOLLARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! motherfucking ridiculous.

i can't sleep.

oh, and i keep forgetting about this.

i can't find a skin i like, which really annoys me, but i'm pretty sure it's not the end of the world.

this makes me really really really uncomfortable. and i don't like not knowing what i can do about it, and i don't like the fact that it will be largely overlooked by the public.

well, it's looking like it's going to be another drug-full new years eve. and my first new years eve away from my highschool boys in 7 years! they're all going to vegas, the dirty bastards. but it's all good. it'll be me, jane, kim, chris(bah.), matt, christine, leslie, ronak, jesse... not too bad of a crowd, really. gotta make the best of what's around, you know? ;)

last year i went to jim's and got drunk. sobered up. drove to kim's and rolled.

don't know that i can do E ever again(well...i probably will *some* day...i can't lie), as i've done way too much and don't really want to ignore the research that is coming out about it. but i'm thinking mushrooms would be a good choice. a little hippy trip never hurt anyone.

i can't believe it's mid-december. this time last year i was a MESS.

and about to embark on the journey that would change my life...

heh.

what the fuck???
Congratulations, you're Elizabeth Bathory!

Hailing from sunny Transylvania, your first blood-related incident was when you stabbed a servant girl in the face with a pair of scissors for underperforming. Some of the red spray landed on your hands, and as you washed it off, you noticed that it left your skin fresh and young looking. From then on you were convinced that the blood of young girls was the secret to eternal youth.

Rather than killing girls outright by stabbing them or slitting their throats, you enjoy torturing them for weeks on end by pricking them with needles or prodding with sharp spikes - all to bathe in their blood. You've killed over six hundred women, all without raising a peep from the authorities.


Which Evil Criminal are You?

yeah, so nikki, i'm stealing more of your ideas. :)

If I were a work of art, I would be Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa. I am extremely popular and widely known. Although unassuming and unpretentious, my enigmatic smile has charmed millions. I am a mystery, able to be appreciated from afar, but ultimately unknowable and thus intriguing. Which work of art would you be? The Art Test

yeah. words cannot express my level of discomfort with posting that.

so my "structure of self and society" class ended up being...well...very strange to say the least. the prof is a good guy, who probably knows his stuff like none other, but he decided to use this semester to develop his "new theory" of sociology. a new theory which i am still not convinced he even slightly understands himself, which made it difficult for him to teach to us. or at least get us to go along with.

for our final paper, we had to write about a conceept which i'm not really sure i buy.

it'd be easier to just type part of it out.

In this class we made the point that some things traditionally considered part of society or culture or ssocial structure, like language, have been shown to be in good part innate, or at least the syntactic component. We went on to suggest that if this is so, then it stands to reason that other aspects of culture might also have an innate component as a part of our mind/brain. One thing was art...
we discussed how the principles of style might be analogous to the principles of syntax.

What I want you to do is to imagine what might be the art equivalence of the 8 chapters of the book How Babies Talk. Each chapter of the book focuses upon some aspect of language development and I want you to think: hmmm, what might be the equivalent o fart development.

ok...so...i completely agree with the fact(yes, it is almost undisputed) that language is innate rather than learned. i find it to be pretty interesting, at that. but he never really proved his case about art in my eyes. we had to read an entire art history book, about the different styles of art and such(linear vs painterly, closed vs open, recessional vs plane), but when it came down to writing this paper i had no clue what the fuck i was going to do. while art is similar to language in that...it is an outward expression...it is something that seperates us from other animals...and so on, i'm not quite sure that i buy into the concept of an "art faculty" in our brains.

so i proceeded to go through and take intricate notes of every damned chapter in the babies book...and then try and push it together with components of the art book and notes i took in class. this took me about 8 hours(not solid hours, mind you. i'm good at taking breaks). once i did it, though, the paper fell together soooo easily, and i'm so damned proud of it!

yeah, sociology is so my perfect field. there are no concrete answers for stuff like this. as long as you're a good bullshitter, you've got it made.

not to say i don't learn anything, because i really truly do. i'm just glad i can chart my own course with my assignments. for the most part.

then there's my race and ethnic relations take-home that is next on my agenda. not gonna be so easy. but i can honestly say i have learned a hell of a lot in that class. and i can no longer blame cultural hostilities on racism.

yeah, think about THAT one for a while.

MAKE MY THROAT and NECK and HEAD STOP HURTING PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!1

because i need a break from my gazillionth hour of paper-writing, i'm gonna steal nikki's idea.

top new albums:-
1.tool - lateralus
2.dmb - the lillywhite sessions
3.howie day - australia
4.john mayer - room for squares(bet you never thought you'd see me put that one)
5.it's really sad that i haven't purchased enough new music this year to complete this category

top singles
1.train - drops of jupiter
2.that one incubus song i can't think of right now
3.dave matthews band - the space between


top live shows i've seen
1.dmb second night gorge
2.dmb first night vegas
3.u2 - phoenix
4.tool - phoenix
5.john mayer in portland(just cuz it was the first time i saw him with the whole band
6.can choose between about 5 other dmb shows...


musical finds of the year
1.howie. howie howie and more howie.
2. john mayer
3.system of a down's self-righteous suicide song


musical disapointments of the year
1.mayer's first shot at room for squares
2.macy gray(which is saying a lot seeing as i wasn't even expecting that much to begin with)
3.the crowd for no doubt while opening for U2 in phoenix


top films
1.Almost Famous
2.Shrek
3.Life as a House


Most dissappointing film
1. Along Came A Spider


top t.v.
1.friends
2.ER
3.7th heaven(hehe. yes, i'm totally serious)


loves of the year
1.dmb
2.new friends
3.old friends
4.road trips

dissappointments of the year:
1.september 11th

loathe of the year
1.sept 11th
2. jerry fallwell and his cronies blaming the events of that day on gays and lesbians and anyone else who goes against them
3.ingorance

hope for 2002
1.a tour that works with my schedule ;)
2.no nuclear holocaust(i just realized i don't know how to spell that word.fuck.)
3.happiness for everyone i love...

holy GOD i feel like shit.

but at least spanish is over forever. :)

evil
i've come to tell you that she's evil
most definitely...

i have to recall last night's events just for the purpose of recording the strange amounts of drama going on. i love the fact that it's drama i can successfully just observe and not actually participate in.

went to see "ocean's eleven" with megan first of all. love it. and not just because i got to drool over two of the most amazingly beautiful men on earth dressed in suits for the entire thing. i'm talking clooney and pitt here. gotta leave damon out of it, because he really just doesn't do it for me.

anyway. megan's got her own set of drama because she has a tendency to be a bit of a kisser. the girl gets horny and drunk and she just can't control herself. so once again, she's caught between two guys who happen to be roommates. one of them is in love with her and the other is her ex.

and so she feels like an asshole. even had a nightmare friday night that i sat her down and yelled at her. a dream that evidently stuck with her so well that she's changing her "evil" ways. heh.

got to gentle ben's afterwards to meet up with jane, colin and kristy. after successfully dodging the cover(i just typed "draft" there.), got upstairs to learn that dan has moved back. dan is the one pre-colin guy that jane has really liked and not fucked things up with. unfortunately, he moved about a month after they met.

and of course, now that she has a boyfriend she really likes, dan is back in town. and when he saw jane earlier in the evening, she asked why he had moved back. to which he replied "because you're here."

now jane really freaks out over stuff like this in a highly amusing way. so we're sitting at a booth, waiting for colin, and dan comes and sits down next to her and starts rubbing her neck. jane slams a beer. her and i go up to the bar to plot what to do next. she runs to the bathroom. meanwhile, colin shows up. jane's still in the bathroom, and i get called an asshole by colin for not introducing him to this new guy sitting with us. so colin and dan start taaaalking up a storm. and i go to get jane.

so jane comes out, gives colin a hug and kiss, and dan promptly dissapears from our table.

which is a bit sad because he is cool as hell(and yes, hot as hell too), but whatever.

so next, i go to matt and christine's. christine's grandfather died friday. and apparently erika had called her up earlier in the night and pretty much said "i know your grandpa just died, but why haven't you been calling me this last week? doesn't our friendship mean anything to you?"

so christine was pretty pissed about that.

so then around 2:30, nick calls to see if i want to come over. damn, i hate saying no to him. i don't see him enough as it is, and i know he has issues with actually calling. but, alas, i couldn't stand the thought of going out in the cold to my car and driving over there, so i said no.

and lastly, don calls me up, freaking out because he's just had unprotected sex.

at that point, i was soooo tired i couldn't even keep my eyes open, and i was just like..."ok. cool. um...what do you want me to do about this? just don't do it again if it's gonna freak you out this much." and he wouldn't let up, so i ended up pretty much telling him it was stupid and that i had nothing to say about it.

damn, i can be understanding.

so, anyway. i really didn't think anything of all the little dramas that went on last night while they were happening, but now that i reflect i'm highly amused.

off to la madre's to put up christmas decorations!

i really believe that the supposed sour cream and onion seasoning on baked lays is actually crack.

i had a lot of vivid dreams last night. and all i remember is that i was doing coke. and lots of it. massive quantities.

very interesting.

i just went up to my mom's to pick up a little package that arrived for me from my aunt and uncle in oklahoma. inside: the too much cd single. they ran across it and thought i might like to have it. that made me smile. totally made my day.

so hold to your permanent bliss
when you barely know that you exist


so tonight's cd of choice is remy zero: villa elaine. brian forced me to listen to them a few years ago, and i fell in love. a perfect combo of radiohead, pink floyd and...U2 maybe?

i'm in a very thoughtful mood tonight since i've gotten home. i've got a lot to do in the next few days, so i tried to get home early, and it didn't really work, but whatever...

it's becoming very apparent that there are several people who aren't too happy about my leaving. not that they're having temper tantrums or crying fits or anything, it's just affecting them quite a bit. matt more than anyone else, i guess. he can't really see any good in the situation. he knows that it's what makes me happy, and that it'll be good for me and all that jazz, but he can't quite get past his sadness over the matter. matt doesn't deal well with change at all - he never has. he isn't going to deal well with the whole "missing me" aspect, but more than that he's realizing that i really am leaving and that life is going to go on as it always has - just without me.

you'd think that that would effect me more than it would him. lol.

jane is pretty emotional over the whole thing too...

i don't know. all i can really say is "dude. don't worry. i'll be back. it'll fly by." but they're very insistant on bringing it up. it is kinda nice in some ways. they're not whining about it or something...i've gotten so many "what you mean to me" talks, and it's nice to see that the things that i love the most about myself come through to them loud and clear. i think they'll all just feel better once i'm there and they actually realize that i still plan on keeping in touch, and once they realize how much i really do care.

at the risk of making everyone around here sound over-dramatic, i have to say that it's not like they haven't seem people move away before, or leave for whatever reason. it happens. it just seems to be different this time.

in other news - i love my highschool boys.

eh, that's old news, i know. i gotta find something new to blog about sometime soon. in the mean time, i'll leave you with my favorite remy zero song(which howie happens to cover quite nicely, i might add.)


i once had marigolds for eyes
that seemed to fade on sunny days
when it's cold as the rain outside
well then so am i

so when it comes down you'll know
i'm with you

how could i show you
it feels good to know you

we once had oceans left to fly
now the trees and the rivers have parted ways
when it seems like the phone has died
well then so have i

so when it comes down you'll know
i'm with you

how could i show you
it feels good to know you

how will you know?

we storm from a small thin line
we're torn from the old frame
when there's no one here to pull you back again...

so when it comes down
you'll know
you'll know...

helena's pulled to the ground
should've known soon she would come down
words were the first thing to go
the light they would never show

how will you know?
how do i show you?
how can i show you?
it feels good to know you

and if you think you know what i'm doing wrong
you're gonna have to get in line


(last ani lyric. i swear.)

i wish there was something i felt like writing besides ani lyrics!

life is still really really good.
i've had a few major anxiety attacks about the move that are highly entertaining.
colin comes home today for a month.
get to see the highschool boys tonight, which you KNOW makes me happy.
great discussion on the freak list about the war. ok, maybe "great" isn't the word, but still - it's good to actually talk about. it seems that whenever i try to talk about the events with anyone who's opinion or thoughts i'm actually interested in hearing, they won't. they say they don't want to talk about it or change the subject...which is understandable. because those are the people who truly understand the implications of everything, and i don't blame them for not wanting to talk about it.


yyyyyyyyyeah, that's abou tit!

( i go through such phases with blogging...)

i''ve had a lack of inhibition
i've had a loss of perspective
i've had a little bit to drink
and it's making me think
i can jump ship and swim
that the ocean will hold me
but there's got to be more than this boat i'm in

cuz they can call me crazy if i fail
oh, the chance that i'm in
is one in a million
and they can call me brilliant if i succeed
and gravity is nothing to me
moving at the speed of sound
just gonna get my feet wet
until i drown...

i've had a lack of information
i've had a little revalation
i'm climbing up on the railing
trying not to look down
i'm gonna do my best swan dive
into shark infested waters
i'm gonna pull out my tampon
and start splashing around

i don't care if they eat me alive
i've got better things to do than survive
i've got the memory of your warm skin in my hands
i've got a vision of blue sky and dry land...

i could just go on and on quoting entire ani songs...but i won't.

right now, at least.

you can't hide behind social graces
so don't try to be all touchy feely
cause you lie in my face of all places
but i've got no problem with that really

what bugs me is that you believe what you're saying
what bothers me is you don't know how you feel
what scares me is that while you're telling me stories
you actually believe that they are real

and i've got no illusions about you
guess what - i never did
when i said i'll take it
i meant as is

just give up and admit you're an asshole
you would be in some good company
and i think you'd find that your friends would forgive you
or maybe i'm just speaking for me

cause when i look around
i think this, this isn't good enough
when i try to lay off of whatever life brings
and when i look down i just miss all the good stuff
and when i look up i just trip over things

and i've got no illusions about you
guess what - i never did
when i say i'll take it
i mean as is

i heard the sound of your bike
as your wheels hit the gravel
and then your engine in the driveway cutting off
and i pushed through the screen door
and i stood out on the porch
thinking FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT at all costs
but instead i let you in
just like i've always done
and i sat you down and offered you a beer
and across the kitchen table i fired several rounds
and you were still standing there when the smoke cleared

and you came crawling back to say
you wanna make good in the end
oh let me count the ways
that i abhore you
and you were never a good lay
and you were never a good friend
but oh, oh what can i say?
i adore you

all i need is my leather
two t-shirts and two socks
i'll keep my hands warm in your pockets
and you can use the engine block
and we'll ride out to california
with my arms around your chest
and i'll pretend that this is real
cuz this is what i like best
you've been juggling to women
like a stupid circus clown
telling us both we are the one
and maybe you can keep me
from ever being happy
but you're not gonna stop me from
having FUN

so let's go before i change my mind
and leave the luggage of all your lies behind
cuz i am bigger than everything that came before
and you were never very kind
and you let me way down every time
but oh, oh what can i say?
i adore you

http://www.rollingstone.com/news/newsarticle.asp?nid=15023

i do it for the joy it brings
because i am a joyful girl...

oh please, lover lay down
and you weep
because it's over...

you know...it's been a really decent day.

nice and rainy and blustery(i might be the only person who has a smile from ear to ear when it's like that outside.) got to try out my new nifty rain coat...works beautifully.

last classes til next august. i realized that i've learned more in my racial and ethnic relations class than i have in my entire college career thus far. i discovered that i have a C in my cognitive psych class - with a B on one test and D's on the other two. now i just have to decide if i wanna take the final or not. it's an option. i'll need a 75% on it to get a B in the class. the thing is - the other tests have been on curves. so that B i was talking about was actually a 64%.

gotta love the "dummying down of education" as one of my soc professors would put it.

anyway. C in my spanish class, as i've said before. not to mention the fact that i NEVER have to take a spanish class again.

went out to dinner with my mom to my favorite restaurant, where we ended up sharing a bottle of wine and talking for a long time. about a bunch of really deep stuff. stuff that usually makes me uncomfortable, but i sucked it up and went with it.

and now i'm online, posting up a storm to the freak list, and chitchatting with my fellow corkwhores.

i can't imagine life without jack n the box commercials. for serious, yo. i mean, that holiday balls commercial? and all the other jack commercials, for that matter...they're an integral part of pop culture that the east coast is totally missing out on!

OOFDAOOFDAOOOOFDA!!

or shall i say, UF da.

word.

ugh. things in israel and palestine are going just as i thought they would. not good, not good.

well, at least bushy-baby gets to use his favorite words and recycle his speeches.

ok. so i've ranted about this before, but seeing as there's been a recent onslaught of the most dreaded commercial of all time, i'll say it again.

those pepsi commercials with brittney and bob dole make me want to never take a sip of that product again. and i'm a total pepsi girl, yo. it's much better than coke. but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. not only is brittney unappealing, she's highly annoying. and when they play that commerical during EVERY frickin break...GAH! and THEN to top it off - you have bob dole at the end. i don't like bob dole. he's a shitty politician, i would NOT have voted for him, and he's GROSS!!!! when i saw him on the viagara commercials, i wanted to break my TV! and the fact that he is sitting with his dog, watching britney, saying "whoa boy." JESUS, FOCKERS! bobdole and sex are not the associations you want me to make with your product, i assure you! talk about a horrible marketing scheme. annoying britney and horny bob dole. good lawd.

yeah. the guys get to look at brittney, and the girls get a 70 year old corpse.

halefrickinlujah.

i think i need to write a letter.

i didn't realize that apartheid laws were just repealed in 1991. i mean...i guess it's one of those things i knew but hadn't actually thought about.

ok. i just read through that superblog below. yeah, it's long. and the semi-annoying part is that i really didn't get to go into each of those little stories as much as i could have - i had a lot to say about all of it! but, alas, i must go to sleep. christmas decorations to put up at my mom's tomorrow, 10 page paper to write...

i had SO much to say. soooo many things that happened tonight. but then i read one of those cnn update emails in my inbox, and what i read just triggered a whooooole new set of thoughts on the matter.

thoughts that i really don't care to discuss now because i'm not informed enough on what exactly is happening, and i'm too stoned to read about it right now.

but it'll be really interesting to see what happens with the shit that's gone down in israel in the past 24 hours.

that said, i'm going to start blogging about all kinds of shit.

first off, southpark is definitely the most clever form of social commentary out there today. period.

anyway. it's been a great couple of days. it's been a great weekend. started off with kicking ass on my spanish oral that was not even worth worrying about. i usually don't worry about school. 95% of my life-in-school i've never worried because...well, i'm a smart girl. i don't say that to be arrogant(ani lyric comes to mind: i don't think that i'm better than you, but i don't think that i'm worse), i just have always done well in school. it comes easily. but maybe that was just because my school was tough. i've yet to figure that one out yet. but before i go completely off on some huge tangent....

5% of my life, i've knowingly and conciously(and i've NEVER been able to spell that word correctly.i'll admit it.) just done badly. but, see, my standards of badly don't include failing. or really getting anything lower than a C, because i never have. but i've grown into this slump this semester, and just doing what i have to to get by. so...i was actually a tad worried about the spanish thing. because there was a chance i might actually get a D in the damned class, which i could deal with because it's still passing, but it really would have fucked with my already lagging GPA.

but, come to find out, the prof for that class is a god and understands the slacker-nature of my class as a whole, and has raised my grade from a 60 to a 70, thus granting me a C and ignoring all of my absences that should have deducted 8% from my already horrible grade.

oh my.
so i am listening to bush. sixteen stone.

and sure, yeah, whatever - i know a lot of people don't like them or take them seriously or whatever, but i'll admit it - i loved this band. we're talking a minorly dmb-esque obsession. i even have 30 bush boots.

heh.

ahem. ok. that cracks me up.

point is - i love them still. this cd is so damned good.



i really like music that has such abstract lyrics...i mean at times, these lyrics are just plain obscureboarderingonstupid, but for the most part it is very poetic. and moody. and i like that.

i'm skipping this song.

oh, ok. i know which story i'm telling next.
i was at matt and christines earlier for a night cap(went over there at 3, and after being sober all night, smoked. shit. it's late.), and a very drunk as hell christine proceeded to tell me a story. a story that involved a girl who's boyfriend was recently found in a hotel room bathtub, both of his wrists slit and a hair dryer in the bath with him. it's the story of a boy who was given $20000 by his parents when he moved to san diego to use for school. come to find out, the 2 and a half years this boy has been living with this girl, he hasn't been going to school or working(where he said he was.).

now. i find this to be a very interesting story. horrifying if you're involved in it, no doubt, but i'd really like to know what exactly is wrong with this guy. just because i don't know that it sounds like an alcohol related...escape. does that make sense? i mean, slitting your wrists and electrocuting yourself...that seems more desperate than depressed.

thing was, and maybe this is awful, but i don't know that i completely believe christine. she was having a hard time with the questions i was asking. like...i wanted to know the full story, because as i said earlier - it's soap opera material, but like...very very dark soap opera material. so while i don't think she was lying about the whole thing, i think there were gaps in the story she didn't know the answers to, so she was kinda filling in because she was so sloshed.

fuck this
better just to lose yourself

sorry, litte music break in there.


anyway. i think there's only one more thing to talk about. (i'm not promising anything though because i'm on a roll right now, and it's so much faster to type out these thoughts than it is to go back to the paper journal and write it all. i don't even know that i'm that comfortable with blogging as much as i have been...but, we're back to that whole "i like typing better than writing" thing.)

anyway.

oh, shit i forgot.
let's see...thursday i went out with jane, but we met up with a bunch of people at the bar. proceeded to get pretty damned drunk. i don't think i've been quite like that in a long time.

well, since...whenever the last time i got drunk like that was, at least.

it was fun, though.

and then last night went to the bars again, but i stayed sober. glass of wine. but everyone else had been drinking, and we all proceeded to have fun.

spent some time at matt's afterwards.

i came to a really great conclusion tonight. things have just really really fallen together around here. i mean with the groups of people i surround myself with regularly. it's been so strange having all of these seperate groups to go see on the 2 nights a week i really go out. there's so many different people to see...but i've been all over all that before.

shit. and glycerine is on. hmmm.

but anyway. these groups have rather nicely merged for the most part it's really hard to explain it, but they have. i get to see all of my favorite people a lot more often. and that's just...a really good thing. tonight i talked jane into going to plush to meet megan and some of her friends with me. first off - i love this bar. it's so different from the rest of the tucson bars(read: not so much of a greek crowd). great atmosphere, comfortable, loud, live music...it's just different from any of the other bars we frequent - and it's definitely my favorite. had a blast there, talking with this friend of jane's who is just out of a 31/2 year relationship, never had sex, living with her ex, never really drinks, and is six foot four. yes, you heard me. SHE is six foot four.

yeah, you guessed it. it interested me.

are we noticing a trend here? things are interesting the hell out of me these days. and i'm not saying i sit there scratching my chin, saying "hmmmmmm, veddy interesting." i have fun with it - isn't this kind of shit what living life is all about?

so, yeah. then me and jane and megan and clay went to this awesome restaurant in downtown tucson.

now. there's a few things you have to understand about the significance of that sentence first of all - it's in downtown tucson. the shoddiest excuse for a downtown any city over 500,000 has ever seen. pathetic. but it's getting so much better! sooo much! there's an awesome venue there that is finally starting to get some good shows, cool shops are opening...and then there's this restaurant! it's kinda like a diner, and is open 24 hours and is NOT DENNY'S OR IHOP!. ahem.

so, the fact that it's cool AND in downtown tucson adds more to it's awesomenes. get it? got it. good.

yes. it excites me to feel like i'm in a real city. one that i like.

i was glad we went. clay is definitely someone i wouldn't mind hanging around more.

and there were drunk people a-plenty! falling down drunk people.

i was sober, though. yes, sober for the second weekend night in a row. i had enough on thursday night i tell you.

so THEN i went to matt and christine's.

and then, i was driving home, just reflecting on a lot of things, and realizing how much i had to say,which is where this insanely long blog comes into play. cuz everyone here is asleep. silly bastards.

but anyway, i realized something that made me feel really fucking good. everything really is coming together around here. groups have again shifted into a really comfortable place. i have a really solid group of friends who i've really grown to love, and who i really do like spending time with. my friendships have grown this time on very individual levels, so that when i say "my group of friends" i'm not referring to a bunch of people who all hang out together, instead it's certain individuals from all the different groups i've hung around with for one reason or another through the years.

and then i realized that i'm going to be leaving all of that. right when things are really really going well.

and the fact that i STILL totally and completely want to do the whole moving thing, the fact that just realizing what i have here has made me smile even more when i think about going...just really tells me it's the right thing to be doing.

honestly, i've gone through similar phases just about every year since i started college - where it's either a faint desire to leave or a situation where i actually kiiiiinda start looking at places to move, colleges to transfer to, summer internships to do...something always happens to change my mind or make me stop thinking about it. but it's never felt right. i've not had the motivation to actually do it, or it's made me too nervous, or things have been really really good and i haven't ended up wanting to leave.

this time, things are really good here. AND i actually followed through with the desire. and i know that it's going to pay off and that i'm not going to regret it.

yay for introspection! go me!

oh my GOD this is long.

heh. i knew i could remember everything i wanted to say - it was a lot, but it all had to come out.

ok.
fucking shit, i'm done.
i'm going to bed!

ooh.
i forgot this was the imported version of sixteen stone(insert laughter here). it's got an extra track at the end - acoustic comedown. oooooooh. aaaaaaaah

so peace!
stay off my back!
or i will attack
and you don't want that!

so peace!
stay off my back!
or i will attack
and you don't want that!

lalalalala. soooo bored. leslie and i are in the process of making the rounds, calling everyone to see what's going on. it's not looking too hopeful. so i figured i'd do a little blog to pass the time.

word.

my mom has decided to kick my brother out. i'm actually rather proud of her. you see...he gets an "allowance." or he GOT an allowance, i should say. she has since stopped giving it to him because he really needs to get a job, rather than sleeping all the time. my thought on the matter is that if he chooses not to take his medicine and refuses to admit that he's got any problems, there's no reason why he shouldn't get a job. but anyway... she used to give him her bank card when they needed groceries and she didn't have time to go get them herself. but then she noticed that he'd take an exxtra $20 out here and there. so she stopped that.

this morning, he came in and said he needed to go get some coke. she told him he couldn't because she only had $2. he got pissy and she ended up giving him a list of groceries and her bank card. when he got back, she asked for the receipt because he was acting weird(he has never been a good liar - some things never change), and he ended up producing one that looked ok. but then she checked online, and he had taken $60 out.

plus, she just got her phone bill and there was $65 in "personal calls" (can you say 900 numbers?). he isn't home now, almost definitely because he's out getting fucked up somewhere now that he has 60 bucks, so she can't tell him just yet. but she's going to tell him that he needs to contact his case manager monday because he can't live at home anymore. my mom is a really easy going, all around understanding woman, but has never delt well with being lied to. she puts a lot of trust in us, and when that's broken, she really just doesn't like it. which is why i've never broken it. :) or at least, broken it in a way that she'd find out about.

it's a difficult decision for her because it isn't just a case of a juvenile delinquent or something. he's almost 20 he's punched several more holes in the wall in his bedroom. he broke the back gate. he broke one of the screen doors. he marks up the walls by doing only god knows what. he freaks out on her regularly. but she's scared to death that he's going to end up on the streetsif she kicks him out.

i've hung out with him a few times recently, and it usualy goes pretty well. but it's really impossible to talk to him, because he gets so agitated so quickly. or...like on thanksgiving. i brought him over here for a while, just so he could get out of the house. we just watched tv, and what not. when i dropped him off at home, i was like "thanks for coming and hanging out with me, daniel. that was cool." and he said "can i have some money?" which is a request that has become very common. he asks me for money every time i see him. he asks my mom for money on almost an hourly basis. he asked my grandpa. my grandma. any of my mom's friends that come over.

i've started to get annoyed with it. maybe i should just bite my tongue. but come on, now. he asked me for money yesterday, and i was just like..."you know, daniel. if you got a job, not only would you have money, but you'd also have something to do. maybe you'd meet some new people."

he never actually starts yelling at me like he does my mom, but i did get a nice door slam in the face.

it's a difficult situation for my mom because it's not like tough love is gonna solve anything. but either is just letting him do what he does.

oh, and in other news, my aunt in atlanta has joined the ranks of the family members who think i should scrap the seattle plans and stay home to help my mom.

granted, she didn't tell me this, my mom did. because none of them actually talk to me.

silly silly relatives.

ok. so i have been productive today, i swear. cleaning, homework, starting to pack certain things up...but then i stopped because i felt like going through my cd-case and writing it all down. and now i feel like sharing. because i just might have the strangest collection of cd's ever. and this is just what's in that 200-CD case.

311 - Transistor, self-titled, Live, Soundsystem

Agents of Good Roots - Straight Around
Alice in Chains - Unplugged
Almost Famous - Soundtrack
Andrew Lloyd Webber's Requiem
Ani Difranco - upupup, Dilate, Out of Range, Little Plastic Castle, Living in Clip, Not a Pretty Girl, Self-titled, Not so Soft
A Perfect Circle

Barenakedladies - Stunt
Bjork - Post, Debut, Homogenic
The Beatles - Abbey Road
Billy Holiday's Greatest Hits
Bob Marley - Legend
Brian Setzer Orchestra
Bush - Sixteen Stone, Razorblade Suitcase, The Science of Things, Deconstructed

Cherry Poppin Daddies
City of Angels - Soundtrack
Chicago - The Musical
The Corrs

Dave Matthews Band - btcs, lws, crash, uttad, l@lc,l@rr, ls, r2t, recently
Dave's Big Deluxe
David Gray - White Ladder
Dazed and Confused - Soundtrack
Dispatch - Bang Bang
DJ Shadow
Duncan Sheik

The Eels - Electroshock Blues
Everclear - Sparkle and Fade, So Much for the Afterglow

Fiona Apple - When the pawn..., Tidal
Fleetwood Mac - The Dance, Rumors
Fuel - Sunburn

Garbage - Self titled, v2.0
Garth Brooks - Fresh Horses, Seven, The Chase, In Pieces, The Hits
Go - Soundtrack
Goo Goo Dolls - Dizzy up the Girl
Grease - Soundtrack
Great Expectations - Soundtrack

Heart - Dreamboat Annie
Hipster Daddy-O
Hole - Live Through This, Celebrity Skin
Howie Day - Australia

I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change - The Musical
Incubus - Make Yourself
Interview With the Vampire - Soundtrack
Into the Woods - The Musical
INXS - kick

Jewel - Pieces of You, Spirit
John Mayer - Room For Squares, Inside Wants Out
Joni Mitchell - Blue
Journey - Greatest Hits

Lauryn Hill
Led Zepellin - Houses of the Holy, Prescence, IV, Early Days
Lemonheads - It's a Shame About Ray
Lillith Fair somethingorotherthatihaveneverlistenedto
Limp Bizkit - Significant Other
Lit - A Place in the Sun

Madonna - Like A Prayer, Imaculate Collection
Matchbox20 - Yourself or someone Like You
Moist - Creature
Moody Blues - Greatest Hits

No Doubt - Tragic Kingdom, Return of Saturn, The Beacon Street Collection, Self-titled
NSYNC

Our Lady Peace - Clumsy

Pat McGee Band - Shine
Phantom of the Opera - The Musical
Phish - A Live One, Junta, Billy Breathes
Pietasters - Live
Pink Floyd - The Wall, Dark Side of the Moon, Wish You Were Here
The Police - The Classics
Portishead - Portishead
Psycho - Soundtrack

Radiohead - The Bends, OK Computer
Ragtime - The Musical
Reality Bites - Soundtrack
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Californication
Real Big Fish - Turn the Radio Up
Remy Zero - Villa Elaine
Ricky Martin
Romeo And Juliet - SOundtrack

Sarah McLaughlan - Surfacing, Fumbling Towards Ecstacy
Save Ferris - Modified, It Means Everything
Scream 2 - Soundtrack
Sheryl Crow - Tuesday Night Music Club, The Globe Sessions
Sneaker Pimps - Becoming X
Souls
Spice Girls - Self titled AND Spiceworld
Stabbing Westward - WIther, Blister Burn and Peel, Darkest Days, Ungod
Sublime - 40 Oz to Freedom
Sunset Boulevard - The Musical

Third Eye Bling - Selftitled, Blue
Tool - Aenema, Undertow, Lateralus, someliveshow, bonus cd from the box set
Tori Amos - Under the Pink, From the Choirgirl Hotel, Little Earthquakes, Boys for Pele, To Venus and Back
Train - Drops of Jupiter
Trisha Yearwood - self-titled, Songbook

Veruca Salt - 8 ARms to Hold you

U2 - Best of 80-90


so there you have it. i pretty much stopped buying cd's when i started trading live shows. i really need to start listening to OTHERMUSIC again.