good fucking lord. i'm so high on life right now. yeah, one of those moods again. and i'm listening to nickel creek and wondering why the fuck i waited so long to buy this cd. i can't get enough.

and yes, i really like everything i just bought. quite a bit. i've listened to it all with the exception of the mraz.

but anyway, yes. very high on life. somehow, i'm getting my wish to see freaky people on new years eve. i'd totally resigned myself to staying here, and was making plans so that it would be as good as it could be...when suddenly, my fortune turned and i find myself with a plane ticket to cincy. and not just for a little quick visit; it'll be tuesday to sunday. i'm so fucking stoked. and so fucking blessed. seriously. just call me brat. i probably deserve it. but you know i'll be more than thankful for every single moment i'm there.

GOD, i can't wait. i don't think i've been this anxious for a trip since the tour opener this year. and when i was trying to make the decision, whether to stay here or go...all i could think was that if i stayed here i'd have a good time, but i'd be thinking of being somewhere else pretty often. but if i went there, a phone call back home to my friends here would do me good enough. seems to me i went through the same kind of thing last year when planning my suprise attack on DC.

anyway. new years is by far my favorite holiday. and i'm just really glad it worked out the way it did.

i got a call a bit ago from jeremy. he'd dropped off a bunch of pictures for me. he leaves tomorrow for his 2 week trip to new york. the guy just graduated from college, and now he's about to embark on this trip that will see him in new york, seeing his favorite band - phish - for new years eve on the night that their hiatus ends. the boy is going to have an amazing time, and that's just the first 48 hours. anyway. when he dropped the pictures off, he was kinda...just...normal. it hadn't hit him yet that he leaves in like 12 hours. and then he called, and it had totally hit him, and i'm just so excited for him!

AND

i really dig this song.

where am i today
i wish that i knew
cause looking around there's no sign of you
i don't remember one jump or one leap
just quiet steps away from your lead

i'm holding my heart out but clutching it too
feeling this sort of a love that we once knew
i'm calling this home when it's not even close
playing the role with nerves left exposed

standing on a darkened stage
stumbling through the lines
others have excuses
i have my reasons why

we get distracted by dreams of our own
but nobody's happy while feeling alone
and knowing how hard it hurts when we fall
we lean another ladder against the wrong wall

and climb high to the highest rung
to shake fists at the sky
others have excuses
i have my reasons why
with som much dececption it's hard not to wander away
it's hard not to wander away