ok. i have been moody as all get out today. flat out bitchy to some, delerious to others... it has not been fun at all. i guess that's what happens when your life is completely stress free for 6 months(did i mention that i got 85 points out of a possible 780 on dateline NBC's stress test?) and then little things all stack up on you at once.

anyway.

i'm feeling blechy again and all...emotional and gross. and howie is playing here tonight. but i just don't really feel like going to see him. for more reasons than i can even state. i was a total bitch to mel this morning, which is one reason. i've got a lot to do...and i really just kinda feel like moping.

which should tell all who know me that something is seriously wrong. lol. i'm missing howie. for the third time in 4 days. that is just w.e.i.r.d.

i did make a major decision this weekend though. i'm moving back to arizona in september. right after the gorge. i think that's a main reason i'm feeling so emotional and stressed out. i told my supervisor today that 2 weeks from tomorrow will be my last day. i'll leave for rapid city the day after that for nik's wedding. then come back and regroup and get shit together for my 3 week jaunt back east where i'll be hitting up 10 dmb shows. no, i cannot afford it. but i don't care one ounce(maybe thing #4943980438934 that's stressing me out?). come back here mid-august and...i haven't decided if i'll ask my temp agency to place me for 2 weeks til gorge or if i'll just go crazy some more with concerts...i'd like to hit mayer in vegas...

i don't know.

the point is, i could be seeing howie in 3 hours. and i don't really want to. fuck - i could be hugging howie in 3 hours. and that doesn't even sound enticing.

worry, people. worry.

;)