ok. sleep's not gonna happen any time soon tonight, so i'll just keep blogging.

meghan came over tonight so that we could go through our scrapbooks. she made two while in high school, and i made 3. ok, well...2 and a half. god, that was such a great time. people are always saying how much they hated their highschools, but i absolutley adored my time there. not to say that i'd go back, because i sure as hell wouldn't, but those are some great memories.

heh. we were pretty fucking dramatic, though. amazing how we fixated on things. i can go back through my diaries now and find events that were totally blown out of proportion that i really just don't even remember now. granted, i was the least dramatic of the three girls i hung out with, but it's still amazing how much angst goes on in a teenager's life. i'm glad to be out of that phase. though, i guess at times like right now, it still comes out a bit. ;)

i'm really glad that i'm still friends with all the boys. the meghan's and i have totally drifted, which is fine by me, but the guys still play a role in my life. and i think i'm ready to start leaning on them a bit again. i've been really distant for the past few years, going my own way and making new friends, just showing up to the occasional party or gathering. but i feel myself gravitating more towards them again. they're such a good group of guys. it amazes me that they've all remained so close through the years.

gah.
but gravitating back towards them is sure to have it's own set of issues...issues involving trust (as usual. GOD i'm predictable.).

we shall see...

coming off of this summer, it's going to be so important that i establish a lot of strong ties here. i'll have a lot to focus on with school and work, but the lonliness factor will probably increase 10-fold, if that is at all possible, and i might actually have to reach out to people. god forbid.

i think it's time to take this blog to my journal.